'Tis The Season

I refuse to believe that as soon as ‘Jingle Bells’ becomes the regular accompaniment to any sort of expeditions outside the house, good taste must disappear. Yet go into any high street or large department store once Christmas has been declared [like a war and by the appearance of the coca-cola advert on TV, naturally] and lo and behold, clothes that were once the height of chic and well thought-out design have now been replaced with green, red and black be-sequined monstrosities.

Why designers appear to think women want nothing more than to look like a portly elf in an unflatteringly cut, sparkly dress that would look better on a four year old angel in the nativity play, I do not know. I am also unsure as to why any semblance of a varied and sophisticated colour palette goes out the window [along with style and the designer's self-respect] as clothes are reduced to these three bold and frankly, quite scary colours. I would also like to meet the woman who looks good in elfin green, rare beast that she is. What I do know is that only the big daddies of fashion appear immune to this outbreak of mass fashion hysteria as a by-product of Christmas cheer. So, to avoid looking like shit this Christmas, either pay big or buy well in advance in autumn rather than in the two month run-up to Christmas. In particular, check out the fabulous arrange of clothing on www.net-a-porter.com, brilliant for finding that perfect Christmas Do outfit. 

However, to avoid sounding too much like scrooge, I feel I should categorically state that I actually love Christmas and indeed, sparkly things, but as with most things in life, I feel moderation is the key to avoid looking like Mrs Claus, or even worse, an overdressed Christmas Tree. If you will insist on colour, experiment with nail or lip colour instead and keep clothing sophisticated – try not to wear all of these so-called ‘festive’ colours all at once. And do not, for the love of all that is good in the world, wear ‘novelty’ costume jewellery in the form of Christmas-carol singing brooches or nasty flashing dangly earrings shaped like snowmen.

And finally, on a more positive note, a red felt hat trimmed with white fur perched at a jaunty angle is allowed.  I’m not sure why, it just is. Season’s greetings!